Jebabba is fading

Jebabba is still refusing food - he hasn't eaten voluntarily since Sunday morning, not even to lick it off my finger. The anti-emetic is continuing to work (still no vomiting), but I don't think it's helping. He's still getting nothing from the food he's keeping down.

I gave him fluids twice yesterday with no effect. He just lays in his sleep sack or on his bed. His stool looks exactly like his food, like it's going in one end and coming out the other with no changes whatsoever. I don't even know if that's possible, but that's what it looks like.

I keep wondering if I should move his appointment tomorrow night up to tonight to spare both of us another day of this, but I'm not ready to give up yet. I know I'm being irrational - when a ferret refuses food and treats completely the way he is and has the look in their eyes like he does, it's the end. But I keep hoping for a miracle. He's the last of my original seven, and it's killing me to watch him like this, but I can't let him go. I know that if nothing changes by tomorrow night, I have to. I can maintain him like this, but I don't want to. His quality of life is greatly diminished, and it's not fair. But like I've said before - I'm a selfish bitch, and I want him with me. Why is it that ferrets can so totally rip our hearts out of our chests when they leave us?

Last night I prepared him for what's coming - we spent the evening together with him in a sleep sack in my lap, and I told him all about the Rainbow Bridge. How he would be healthy and whole again, how he could have all the chicken baby food and treats that he can't have now, and how he's going to see all of his friends again, and they'll play together again - all young, all healthy, all happy. I told him that Bonk was waiting for him along with Cheeba, Mojo, and Sophie, and they would have a great reunion. I told him how brave he's been and how strong, and how if he wants to let go, it's ok.

I just hope that when tomorrow comes, I can make the decision I have to make without delaying. He deserves better than to linger in this state. I love him too much to let him do that.

Tags

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ferret, ferrets, IBD, Rainbow Bridge